09-03-2015, 04:52
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#1
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: 18 yrs upstate NY, 30 yrs South Florida, 20 yrs Conch Republic, now chasing G-Kids in NOVA & UK
Posts: 11,901
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Tsarnaev Slips on Banana....
Let us celibate the good news..
Quote:
Boston Marathon Bomber Tsarnaev Severely Injured In Prison, May Never Walk Or Talk Again
Posted on August 31, 2015 by Raoul Stockton
FORT DEVENS, Massachusetts - Accused Boston Marathon Bomber Severely Injured In Prison, May Never Walk Or Talk Again
Infamous Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, 22, was the victim of an “unfortunate accident” yesterday at Ft. Devens Detention Center in Massachusetts, just a few short months after his high-profile trial and sentencing, according to warden Paul Jacobson.
Corrections officers reportedly found the terror suspect face down in a pool of his own blood in his cell; a banana peel was found on the floor nearby.
“It initially appeared as though Tsarnaev slipped on a discarded banana peel and hit the floor with such force that his head bounced off the hard tile surface, probably 16 or 17 times. There was blood everywhere – all over the walls, the floor, even the toilet. The injuries have caused massive brain trauma,” said prison investigator Joe Goldsmith. “We determined though, through expert analysis, that it would be impossible for these injuries to have occurred through a fall. Our investigation has shown that that it was the Aryan Brotherhood who initiated an attack on Tsarnaev.”
“Yes, it was the brotherhood who took care of that bomber,” said Miles Smith, head of the Aryan Nation inside Devens. “The other gangs, they wanted him, too. We paid the guards the most money to have a shot. They stood aside, and let us do what we do. On the way out, they shook our hands, told us ‘Thank you.’ Well, You’re welcome. You’re welcome, Boston. You’re welcome, America!”
“Normally, an attack this violent, this cruel, on another inmate would get any offending party more time added to their sentence,” said warden Jacobson. “Because of the nature of Tsarnaev’s crimes, though, we have decided to actually reduce the sentences of the Aryan members who were involved. They have done our prison and our country a great service, and we appreciate it immensely. They are heroes in the eyes of not only this institution, but also in the eyes of the people of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.”
Tsarnaev had pled not guilty to all thirty charges filed against him, but was found guilty on all counts in April. He was sentenced to the death penalty per the crimes committed.
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__________________
Go raibh tú leathuair ar Neamh sula mbeadh a fhios ag an diabhal go bhfuil tú marbh
"May you be a half hour in heaven before the devil knows you’re dead"
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JJ_BPK is offline
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09-03-2015, 05:27
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#2
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Area Commander
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Indianapolis
Posts: 2,086
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I wish....
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Daniel
GM1 USNR (RET)
Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Streck-Fu is offline
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09-03-2015, 18:13
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#3
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 440
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Snopes says NOT. Nice thought though.
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CW3SF is offline
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09-03-2015, 19:46
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#4
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Area Commander
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Cochise Co., AZ
Posts: 6,177
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CW3SF
Snopes says NOT. Nice thought though.
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Their "about" button says that they are a satirical website.
Pat
__________________
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"The bigger the government, the smaller the citizen." -- Dennis Prager
"The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false-face for the urge to rule it." --H.L. Mencken
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