Kyobanim
11-03-2005, 09:56
This is often posted as an actual radio conversation between a US naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. It's really not, but it is funny.
CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees South to avoid a
collision.
AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees North to
avoid a collision.
CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees
to the South to avoid a collision.
AMERICANS: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert
YOUR course.
CANADIANS: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE
SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES
ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY
THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND
NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT
YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH.
I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH,
OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO
ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.
CANADIANS: THIS IS A LIGHTHOUSE. YOUR CALL.
CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees South to avoid a
collision.
AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees North to
avoid a collision.
CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees
to the South to avoid a collision.
AMERICANS: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert
YOUR course.
CANADIANS: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.
AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE
SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES
ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY
THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND
NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT
YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH.
I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH,
OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO
ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.
CANADIANS: THIS IS A LIGHTHOUSE. YOUR CALL.