View Full Version : Beware the Ides of March
It's that time of year again people. I feel it is my duty to take up the mantle of Spurinna - beware the Ides of March and the days that follow for you are all in danger. It is this time of year that visits terrible plagues upon mankind...
In 44 BC conspirators stabbed Caesar to death right in front of the Roman Senate
In the 5th Century St Patrick chased all the snakes out of Ireland causing Jameson Whisky to turn green for several days each year.
The clocks are going to mysteriously jump us all an hour into the future
Czar Nicholas abdicated his throne
Germany invaded Czechoslovakia
CBS canceled the Ed Sullivan Show
SARS
Cricket was invented, leading to that age-old question, "Cricket, isn't that just European Baseball?"
Tom Hanks savagely unleashed movies like "Splash" and "The Money Pit" on innocent civilians.
The USA initiated a 2-week lockdown to "flatten the curve" from a deadly virus so horrible that only 99.8 percent of civilization has any hope of survival.
Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing
This shit just isn't funny anymore.
Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing
This shit just isn't funny anymore.
No, it isn't :mad:
rsdengler
03-03-2021, 09:18
Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing
This shit just isn't funny anymore.
Correctomundo...Sort of reminds me of a crappy stand up comic with bad jokes.... it's like walking through that door knowing there is danger on the other side..
Sort of reminds me of a crappy stand up comic with bad jokes....
She actually reminds me of Shelly Marsh - I can even see her stirring her evil witches brew of leftist hatred while she's chants her curses upon the right side of America:
Furniture polish, paint thinner and bleach...
...Ammonia and antifreeze. One tablespoon each.
I hate everybody, I just like to read...
...Republicans are stupid and won't legalize weed.
So with this eldritch potion and these ancient words...
...I take my revenge on Republican turds.
just my two cents
rsdengler
03-03-2021, 11:02
She actually reminds me of Shelly Marsh - I can even see her stirring her evil witches brew of leftist hatred while she's chants her curses upon the right side of America:
Furniture polish, paint thinner and bleach...
...Ammonia and antifreeze. One tablespoon each.
I hate everybody, I just like to read...
...Republicans are stupid and won't legalize weed.
So with this eldritch potion and these ancient words...
...I take my revenge on Republican turds.
just my two cents
I think your "two cents" just cursed us, or we are transforming into Kermit the Frog...Bahahahaha...Hopefully you have an antidote handy.....:D
I'd prefer you not drag Kermit the Frog into this thread. The muppets are rife with negative stereotypes, cultural microaggressions, and out right bigotry. That as well as the problem that I sense a bit of trans-phobia in your comment about transformation. On the mater of an antidote - I cannot say for sure, but there are rumors that Shelly Marsh's recipe is actually the secret ingredients used in 'woke kool aid'
...if that is true, there is no antidote
There is no antidote, no cure, no hope.
All that being said,
This is the comedy zone - lets not invite ANY of the muppets and their negative stereotypes, cultural microaggressions, and out right bigotry into our happy little safe place.
Thank you and have a wonderful day.
rsdengler
03-04-2021, 15:29
. On the mater of an antidote - I cannot say for sure, but there are rumors that Shelly Marsh's recipe is actually the secret ingredients used in 'woke kool aid'
...if that is true, there is no antidote
There is no antidote, no cure, no hope.
Well, if there is no antidote, no cure or hope then we might as well stock up on alcoholic beverages and have a good time....hahaha...:D
...we might as well stock up on alcoholic beverages
Now you're talking. For mid-March booze, I would recommend at least one bottle of Jameson. It is the perfect balance of spicy, nutty and vanilla notes with hints of sweet sherry and exceptional smoothness that really hits the spot around St Patricks Day
A good Irish Whiskey is just what the doctor ordered to help survive the Ides of March and the evil that follows...
Two bottles would be even better.
rsdengler
03-05-2021, 11:47
Agreed...I'm not a whiskey drinker, but maybe I ought to start just to survive the evils of hexes and dark witchcraft potions.....plus I could use a few stiff drinks at the moment......
Now you're talking. For mid-March booze, I would recommend at least one bottle of Jameson. It is the perfect balance of spicy, nutty and vanilla notes with hints of sweet sherry and exceptional smoothness that really hits the spot around St Patricks Day
A good Irish Whiskey is just what the doctor ordered to help survive the Ides of March and the evil that follows...
Two bottles would be even better.
Agreed..
But, Boris(my cuz from another bar) is wheeling & dealing with Sniffy Joe..
PSA
Whisky tariff drops from 25% to ZERO %
The United States will now temporarily suspend all retaliatory tariffs on direct exports from the UK after a settlement agreement over the Airbus despite.
It means Scotch whisky will now see its tariffs go from 25 per cent to 0 per cent, as will textiles such as cashmere.
https://www.scotsman.com/news/politics/scotch-whisky-tariffs-suspended-in-new-us-agreement-3154414
Two bottles would be even better.
Two is one, one is none. :D
Two is one, one is none. :D
But two plus one...is 3! :lifter
rsdengler
03-06-2021, 13:40
But two plus one...is 3! :lifter
Might as well go for the case....;)
But two plus one...is 3! :lifter
There you go with that racist math.
Here's how it goes:
One for you.
One for me.
One for you.
Wait. That's not fair. Let's start over...
One for me.
One for you.
One for me.
:D
One for me...
fuck off
More for me
But two plus one...is 3! :lifter
Is that core math? :D
Might as well go for the case....;)
Now you're talking!
Originally Posted by rsdengler
Might as well go for the case....
Now you're talking!
Just my two cents - any talking done after a case of Jameson is going to resemble a Joe Biden campaign speech.
rsdengler
03-07-2021, 13:25
Just my two cents - any talking done after a case of Jameson is going to resemble a Joe Biden campaign speech.
In my case 2 glasses...bahahaha...:D
Just my two cents - any talking done after a case of Jameson is going to resemble a Joe Biden campaign speech.
:D chioueioyrmkmnvh wwioej iveihe uh huh
Is that core math? :D
No I believe core (Dims) math would be more like;
1 for you, 2 for them
1 for you, 3 for them
etc
bblhead672
03-09-2021, 09:45
Just my two cents - any talking done after a case of Jameson is going to resemble a Joe Biden campaign speech.
Only it will make more sense than Joe Bidet.
No I believe core (Dims) math would be more like;
1 for you, 2 for them
1 for you, 3 for them
etc
Aye. :D
rsdengler
03-10-2021, 08:08
No I believe core (Dims) math would be more like;
1 for you, 2 for them
1 for you, 3 for them
etc
Aye. :D
Heck, the Dems would take the entire case and leave you with a sip....;)
Heck, the Dems would take the entire case and leave you with a sip....;)
Not completely accurate.
I'm going to work from an asymmetric timeline so try to follow along.....
Democratic policy will entitle you to one case. (for argument sake, lets say a case comes from the factory as 100 individual bottles)
This case will be delivered directly into your hands by a delivery service headquartered in the home town of a prominent politician. This delivery service will enjoy freedom from local competition based on sizable campaign donations that result in favorable legislation. The delivery service has to cover an 18 bottle federal excise tax that goes back to the government...
-the case of Irish whiskey now has 82 bottles
The vendor has to give up a jobber fee to the distributor to allow the truck to sport that famous product logo - the jobber fee is minimal and well worth the overall profit recognized by the distributor
-the case of Irish whiskey now has 76 bottles
The distributor has to cover the health care costs associated with Obamacare as well as the fees for their liquor license and the carbon offsets created by their storage facilities.
-the case of Irish whiskey now has 37 bottles
The importer has to tariffs.
-the case of Irish whiskey now has 12 bottles
The manufacturer has to pay import fees to ensure his bottling operation is in compliance with US laws and ATF regulations regarding ingredients and purity
--the case of Irish whiskey is empty and the buyer is about 4 bottles in the hole
The USA suspends tariffs on Scotch and Irish Whiskies
-the case of Irish whiskey now has 21 bottles
In addition to the 18 percent sales tax, the US government has enacted a 2.5% "sin tax" and a .25% recycle tax on all glass bottles.
-the case of Irish whiskey now has one bottle that is only 1/4 full.
THAT is the "sip" you are referring to.
Dont drink and drive.
rsdengler
03-10-2021, 08:59
THAT is the "sip" you are referring to.
Dont drink and drive.
Na, no need to drink and drive. I'll just hang out on my deck and enjoy that splendid smooth after taste of my "sip" of whiskey and bask in the rays of the warm sun....dreaming about a bottle of whiskey instead...lol....;)