View Full Version : Facebook Parenting: For The Troubled Teen
My kinda thinking...:lifter
And so it goes...
Richard :munchin
Facebook Parenting: For The Troubled Teen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kl1ujzRidmU#!
greenberetTFS
02-10-2012, 11:39
My kinda thinking...:lifter
And so it goes...
Richard :munchin
Facebook Parenting: For The Troubled Teen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kl1ujzRidmU#!
We were pretty fortunate,never had to address problems like that,my kids today are in they're early 50's and late 40's,however that's when drugs and promiscuous sex started among the teens,which we were lucky and never had to deal with.......:)
Big Teddy :munchin
John_Chrichton
02-10-2012, 12:06
My kinda thinking...:lifter
And so it goes...
Richard :munchin
Facebook Parenting: For The Troubled Teen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kl1ujzRidmU#!
That letter is disgusting. Well done dad!
Well, the story doesn’t end there. In a new post on Jordan’s Facebook page, he says that numerous people called the police and child protective services as a result of his viral (millions of hits) video. And both paid him a visit.
“For those that feel the need to keep calling the police and CPS,” the Stanly County, North Carolina resident writes, “lol.“ Those letters are the universal symbol for ”laugh out loud.”
He‘s laughing because both the police and child protective services didn’t find anything wrong.
“Apparently both the local police and the department of social services are OK with it. Yes they came. Of course they came. They received enough ‘Oh my god he’s going to kill his daughter’ comments that they had to. I knew that the moment it went viral.. it [sic] was too late and it was inevitable. I’m only surprised it took as long as it did to be honest,” he explains.
In fact, he says the police told him “Kudos, Sir“ and he received a ”thank you” from an entire detectives squad. Another officer, he says, “is using it in a positive manner in his presentation for the school system.”
Full Story (http://www.theblaze.com/stories/dad-who-shot-up-daughters-laptop-with-a-45-says-cops-paid-him-a-visit/)
:lifter
Pat
We are very fortunate to have two great sons. It is interesting to watch them develop into adults and the challenges they face. Our oldest is 21, he never had a desire for college. So he went into the work world. He did have desire to look into LE. So last November he applied for the Indiana police academy. And was accepted after completing the interviews, assesments and sponsorship by a local PD. He is now in his 5th week and loving it. The thing is several of his friends have pulled away from him. And he is a bit bitter and confused about it. He is on a very rigirous schedule being up at 5am for the academy. After a full day of academics and PT he is pretty much toast by
9:30. Meaning he very rarely goes out during the week. We are very proud of his choice and tell him that. Along wtih reinforcing his REAL friends will stand by him. There is a saying "as people grow up, they realize it becomes less important to have more friends, and more important to have REAL ones". Life lessons.
Eh, I think he way over-reacted. Teens say bitchy stuff about their parents, that's what they do. They think everything is unfair, and they all think they're "slaves" for having to do a few chores. Now maybe there is more to the relationship that we don't know just from the news...maybe this kid has had more than a few misbehaviors, however, he's supposed to be the parent and the adult.
He's supposed to be the one setting a good example, and he just had a temper tantrum with a firearm and recorded it for the whole world to see. All because his teen said something mean about him on her FB page. Not exactly an "adult" thing to do. I'm unimpressed. :(
No offense, but do you have kids??
Sometimes kids need to have it brought down to their level in order for them to understand.
It is one thing to talk crap about your parents, on the phone or texting, like most kids do. But if they are going to post out there for the whole world to see (except for the parents they unfriended) they better be able to handle the wrath of said parents. My kids all understand that if they EVER did something like this, me posting something on Facebook would be the least of their worries.:D
MOO, this exchange is a good reminder that there's a big difference between getting someone's attention and whoring for attention on the internet.
The fact that the parent could not remember why he'd put his daughter on punishment in the first place begs the question -- is his objective to teach his daughter a set of values and skills that will help her, or is he more concerned with demonstrating who has power over whom?
The fact that the parent's preferred tool of communication and discipline is a deliberate act of public humiliation is problematic. If the kid decides to participate in this dynamic, where will it end? Will she shape up, or will she up the stakes by making posts of a different kind in a different sector of cyberspace. /s/, /b/, /cgl/ are but three options before one even gets to Twitter and associated social media.
And before one concludes that the self described IT professional has it all figured out, I'm sure the parents of many young people feel the same way even though their kids are carrying around two cellphones with built in cameras.
My $0.02. YMMV.
Surgicalcric
02-14-2012, 15:58
She is lucky...my father would have caved my grill (teeth) had I been a disrespectful, ungrateful twit like this girl.
I would not have done what this father did but I wont sit in judgment of him either.
Crip
A Good Ole Southern Boy from NC at that. Personally I like his style. :D
My daughter must take after me. A couple of years a go she threw her husbands Xbox out the back door just as hard as she could. Yep, he was standing right there when she did it too. :)
I've given my 3 sons some simple relationship advice that works well for us. Whether the relationship is parent, spouse, or superior, inside each of those is a man or a woman.
We talk things out on the father/son layer.
However, if they dig too deep or too hard into someone, and keep on past the relationship border, they're gonna hit areas where they are simply provoking another human
Then, absent physical harm, that human has as much right to get as loud and ugly as anyone else. That goes for parents too. Seems kids sometimes forget the "other identity" of their parents.
The Reaper
02-14-2012, 17:59
She is lucky...my father would have caved my grill (teeth) had I been a disrespectful, ungrateful twit like this girl.
I would not have done what this father did but I wont sit in judgment of him either.
Crip
Concur.
TR
Tweeder11
02-14-2012, 20:32
Being a young father, I'll never forget a lesson my father once showed me when I was in 7th grade. I was having a "motivation problem" in school as well as a lying problem (yeah, I was that kid) and I kinda told my dad I finished my homework when I really hadn't even looked at it, in order to watch a new DVD I had just gotten as a gift... it Was Gone In 60 Seconds.
When I later sat down and "suddenly remembered I had homework to do" he counted aloud as that movie became GONE IN 60 SECONDS and then for another 60 seconds I had a nice round man to man... I hated that SOB back then... today I can't think of a better role model and man I respect and love more.
Moral of the story: sometimes you need to get your ass kicked or your world rocked to put you back in place... and most of the time, the person who is willing to do that, cares about you more than someone who makes it easy on you.
Thanks and take care,
Tweeder
But Sig's right[.]I don't hear/read this nearly as often as (I think) I should.:boohoo :rolleyes:
Somewhere around 15 or 16 a "switch" flips in teenagers. The amount of "juice" provided depends on many factors. The teen, parents, home life, friends, school life, etc.
Somewhere around 22 or 23 the switch flips back off and the sudden loss of "juice" causes selective amnesia in the young person's brain - "I did what? No, I would never have done something like that. I was the perfect child."
FWIW - I think the video is but a 'snapshot' of what I suspect is a much bigger set of issues which have been going on within that family for awhile and we have no clue as to exactly what the situation may be or how long it has been going on.
I just found it amusing and glad to see the father chose to shoot a laptop vice physically taking it out on his kid, dog, spouse, etc.
Dramatic, sure, but sometimes it takes something dramatic to reach a person, especially an adolescent, to provide them that "Ah-Ha!" moment when they suddenly realize there's a much broader universe beyond their "Me-One-Point-Oh" world, when they pause and consider just how far do they really wanna push something or someone.
Anyway, it gave me a good chuckle and I hope it works out for the best for the father, his daughter, and their family.
And so it goes...
Richard :munchin
I would never shoot something I might have to replace.
"Daddy, since you shot my lap top you need to get off your computer so I can do my homework."
Nope - ain't gonna' happen here.
DJ Urbanovsky
02-15-2012, 10:36
There's a time for the carrot, and a time for the stick.
The laptop shooting didn't bother me, but what did was the comment that the daughter had been grounded for 3 months. Three months, really? Is that the normal sentence for teens these days? Punishment should fit the crime and shooting the laptop was fitting, I suppose. But 3 months of restriction? By the time it was over, no one remembers what the crime was and all that's left is a daughter with resentment issues.
Like Richard said, there's more going on that we know about.
S.
FWIW, I'd have found the video funny if (a) it had seemed more spontaneous and/or (b) the dad had let pictures do more of the talking, and/or (c) it hadn't been so long. (There's a thread across the street centering around (a).) As for (b) I wish he'd used the opportunity to contrast his daughter's reality to her interpretation of it For example, had he read a passage from the letter and then shown her bedroom he could have sent a nice message saying "Really?"
Also, had he been more over the top when he destroyed his daughter's computer I think the video would have generated less controversy and more conversation about the challenges of parenting today.
As for the video's length, my attention span isn't what...oh, a guava turnover from Porto's!
GratefulCitizen
02-15-2012, 21:49
Human beings are complex and raising children is a difficult task.
The person best suited to make difficult decisions regarding children would be the person with the best information and the best intentions.
Unless and until it can be demonstrated that the father is not the person with the best information and the best intentions, it's his call.
There are far to many meddlers in the world who think they know better.
CloseDanger
02-15-2012, 22:07
Many different cultures, many different styles, and Technique in being a Father.
There are new challenges to parenting today, and this Man decided to address it and he shall become a figure in this dilemma.
He was not really angry, merely aggravated and communicated with his Daughter in a way she may understand. Line by line.
In a very boring and long videotape.
He is a good Father and far be it from me to condemn his disciplinary actions at all other than maybe putting his Family in the spotlight, albeit maybe un-wittingly.
He sure has done more to discipline his children than half of the Nation. That's less work for Social workers, Cops, and all the rest of us have to bear in the long run.
I pray things work out and good on him.
Entire post.How does posting a video on the internet translate into "maybe putting his Family in the spotlight, albeit maybe un-wittingly"?
How does posting a public video that is almost certainly going to end up with various concerned citizens, busy-bodies, and others calling the local authorities translate into "less work for Social workers, Cops, and all the rest of us have to bear in the long run"? Source is here (http://www.wtam.com/cc-common/news/sections/newsarticle.html?feed=104668&article=9756290).Tommy Jordan has become somewhat of a hero to millions of parents. Jordan is the dad who found a secret Facebook post his daughter wrote about not wanting to do chores and said Jordan and his wife (the girl’s mother) treated her as a “slave.” He didn’t take kindly to that. So he recorded an eight-minute video that showed him reading the note while smoking a cigarette and ended with him shooting nine “exploding hollow point” rounds into the girl’s computer.
Well, the story doesn’t end there. In a new post on Jordan’s Facebook page, he says that numerous people called the police and child protective services as a result of his viral (millions of hits) video. And both paid him a visit.
“For those that feel the need to keep calling the police and CPS,” the Stanly County, North Carolina resident writes, “lol.“ Those letters are the universal symbol for ”laugh out loud.”
He‘s laughing because both the police and child protective services didn’t find anything wrong.
“Apparently both the local police and the department of social services are OK with it. Yes they came. Of course they came. They received enough ‘Oh my god he’s going to kill his daughter’ comments that they had to. I knew that the moment it went viral.. it [sic] was too late and it was inevitable. I’m only surprised it took as long as it did to be honest,” he explains.
In fact, he says the police told him “Kudos, Sir“ and he received a ”thank you” from an entire detectives squad. Another officer, he says, “is using it in a positive manner in his presentation for the school system.”
“How’s about those apples?” he asks. “Didn’t expect THAT when you called the cops did you?”
So, in his effort to teach his daughter a lesson in being respectful of others' hard work, Mr. Jordan subjected his entire community to an unnecessary public expense that he foresaw. He sure showed her.