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Chuck Norris Doesn't Play a Texas Ranger; He Is a Texas Ranger
Gov. Rick Perry designated Norris and his brother, stunt coordinator and producer Aaron Norris, honorary Texas Rangers.
http://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local-beat/Chuck-Norris-Doesnt-Play-a-Texas-Ranger-He-Is-One-111235999.html
And that and a $1.79 will get you a cup of the Coffee of the Day at Starbucks. ;)
Richard :munchin
Bill Harsey
12-03-2010, 08:49
I think they know it's just an honorary thing.
Best wishes to the old man.
I think they know it's just an honorary thing.
Best wishes to the old man.
Sir-Chuck's gonna need an honorary Texas Ranger Bowie, as well...
:D
On edit, I'd like to throw in that it seems a tad incongruous for a man who got his ass whipped by a Chinese dancer to recieve an award from the Texas Rangers.
Bill Harsey
12-03-2010, 08:56
Sir-Chuck's gonna need an honorary Texas Ranger Bowie, as well...
:D
On edit, I'd like to throw in that it seems a tad incongruous for a man who got his ass whipped by a Chinese dancer to recieve an award from the Texas Rangers.
That's Horrigans job.
1stindoor
12-03-2010, 09:16
HUH? I thought the Texas Rangers were getting Honorary Chuck Norris titles.
HUH? I thought the Texas Rangers were getting Honorary Chuck Norris titles.
So did Chuck. :p
Richard :munchin
dr. mabuse
12-03-2010, 09:44
*
Kyobanim
12-03-2010, 12:00
sure took em long enough
Masochist
12-03-2010, 13:32
Chuck Norris Doesn't Play a Texas Ranger; He Is a Texas Ranger
Gov. Rick Perry designated Norris and his brother, stunt coordinator and producer Aaron Norris, honorary Texas Rangers.
http://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local-beat/Chuck-Norris-Doesnt-Play-a-Texas-Ranger-He-Is-One-111235999.html
And that and a $1.79 will get you a cup of the Coffee of the Day at Starbucks. ;)
Richard :munchin
No $1.79 needed. Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
And in TX, doesn't Starbucks have five sizes, instead of the usual four? Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Chuck Norris? :D
mark46th
12-03-2010, 19:18
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
The earth is held to Chuck Norris by gravity.
99meters
12-03-2010, 19:44
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Masochist
12-03-2010, 21:13
The Texas Rangers don't make Chuck Norris an honorary Texas Ranger. Chuck Norris makes the Texas Rangers honorary Chuck Norrises.
Well, I guess that's o.k., as long as Chuck isn't wearing that stainless steel Taurus M9 clone when he's wearing the badge!
We've gotta keep up standards here in Texas. ;)
I have one that I bought back in '86 or so (blued not chrome). It has been an excellent handgun.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, too bad he never cries.
When Superman goes to bed, he wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
,...and.....
EX-Gold Falcon
12-05-2010, 22:18
Thanksgiving is SO late Nov and Christmas is still 20 days away.
Were it not for Ranger Norris, we'd have nothing to celebrate; lord knows Wikileaks provides only comic relief....
T.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, too bad he never cries.
Outstanding, WD!:D
Chuck Norris began to commercially bottle his urine for sale. We now know that drink as Red Bull
ZonieDiver
12-06-2010, 12:31
Then there is this...
For a guy born in 1940, he's doing all right.
The boogieman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris
The boogieman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris
:D Now, that's funny, Bro!
:D Now, that's funny, Bro!
...it has finally happened, can't beleive it, Chuck Norris jokes online.
http://www.mustsharejokes.com/page/Chuck+Norris+Jokes
The only thing Chuck Norris is afraid of is his own shadow!
Richard :munchin
Masochist
12-07-2010, 16:19
...it has finally happened, can't beleive it, Chuck Norris jokes online.
http://www.mustsharejokes.com/page/Chuck+Norris+Jokes
And if you want tee shirts with your jokes (not that anything associated with Chuck Norris is a joke *hides*):
http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
Kyobanim
12-07-2010, 16:41
LMFAO at this one
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem: It wouldn't take shit from anybody
Masochist
12-07-2010, 17:03
LMFAO at this one
As a fan of two-ply, I was laughing (cringing?) at the accompanying picture.
Hidden within Chuck Norris' beard, is another fist.
99meters
12-10-2010, 01:09
God made Chuck Norris so soldiers and firefighters can have a hero.:D
1stindoor
12-10-2010, 07:58
Chuck Norris sued NBC over the show Law and Order...which were the trademark names of his left and right legs.
The only thing Chuck Norris is afraid of is his own shadow!
Richard :munchin
I would a agree with this statement but its a proven fact the sun is afraid of Chuck Norris therefore would never cast a shadow :D
Chuck Norris traded his soul to the Devil for striking good looks and unsurpassed karate skills. Chuck round kick the devil and took his soul back and now he and the devil are good friends and play poker everyother Wednsday.
Chuck was in all 6 Star Wars movies.....as THE FORCE
jd
sicatrix
12-11-2010, 12:51
Chuck Norris does not stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bed frames, and sidewalks.
EX-Gold Falcon
12-11-2010, 13:48
Chuck was in all 6 Star Wars movies.....as THE FORCE
jd
I thought he was the one Warrior God that the Klingons were too afraid to kill?
T
Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He does push-downs (the earth moves away)