HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

[BMT (RIP)]

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy ofGuns & Ammo Magazine
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Bubba,

Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour.
Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

Better wait outside. Be right back.

Snake

[Red Flag 1]

Works for me.

When I was @ Ft. Sam in 1969, there was a story about a jewelery store just outside the main gate. The story claims that after repeated break-ins, the owner went out and bought a large terrarium in which he place three pretty big diamond backs. The terrarium was front and center in the display window with a sign that said, "beware, snakes are loose in the store after hours". The story continues to claim break-ins stopped but fire insurance went up after the FD said they would not go in the building for any reason as long as the snakes were there.

At least that's how the story went.

RF 1