View Full Version : "Never mind..."
My wife and I played out this scenario last night while preparing dinner together; fortunately, the dinner and wine were excellent (grilled rib-eyes, chilled black bean mango salad, and a Banfi Brunello di Montalcino) and peace had been restored by the time we finished eating. ;)
And so it goes...
Richard :munchin
A man is a person who, if a woman says, "Never mind, I'll do it myself,"...lets her.
A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her...gets mad.
A man is a person who, if a woman says to him, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her and she gets mad says..."What are you mad about, NOW!?"
A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her and she gets mad, and he says, "Now what are you mad about?" says..."If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you."
Dozer523
07-09-2010, 07:16
I could NEVER have (get away with) this conversation at my house.
Bill Joyner
07-09-2010, 07:29
My wife asks me to do something (housekeeping wise) then hovers over me and tells me how it should be done!
And "nothing's wrong" means something is definitely wrong and you better sleep with one eye open. "Fine." is much more ominous...
It's all in the training.
Sir Richard, that is sooo true!
Reminds me of the analogy that my BF gave:
Woman sitting at bar, playing eyesoccer with a handsome guy when suddenly she notices his eyes travel to her breasts
She sits a little more erect so they jut out more and smiles coyly as she looks away.
He continues to linger his gaze on her ample bossom as her eyes meet his again and then...
She is thinking...."oh he is still looking at my boobs. <pause>
hhmmm, i hope my boobs look good in this bra <pause>
oh boy, do my boobs look too big in this bra?
i hope he likes large breasts
oh no....what if he thinks they are TOO big
(meanwhile, handsome guy is still longingly looking at her breasts)
He probably thinks I look too fat cuz of my large boobs
I wish I had just stayed home tonite!!!! <panic and anger setting in and self loathing follows>
Meanwhile, he is just thinking about how that bra is going to look on the floor next to his bed! :D
Sierra Bravo
07-09-2010, 09:36
this is a daily occurrence in my household.
so far I'm 2 for 3
TrapLine
07-09-2010, 09:42
wise husbands learn quickly that "never mind I'll do it myself" should be responded to by "no no, I'll do it right now." And "nothing's wrong" means something is definitely wrong and you better sleep with one eye open. :D
In our house, when she says "nothing is wrong" it really means I should make every effort short of water-boarding her to find out if something is wrong. When I say "nothing is wrong" in most cases it means NOTHING IS WRONG and in a few cases it means I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. Oh the joys of interpersonal communication:rolleyes:.
Utah Bob
07-09-2010, 10:00
I'll bring it up tonight over Chili and an Aussie Shiraz.:D
Is that even possible?Yes.
.
Is that even possible?
Thats what I say! LOL But apparantly there are women out there that get into that thinking... :D
greenberetTFS
07-09-2010, 11:13
My wife makes me laugh when she tells me her boobs now are enormos,and they are.......... :eek: She said how much she wishes that she had them as a teenager.......;)
Big Teddy :munchin
.
LibraryLady
07-09-2010, 11:29
... We all need a "male-to-female" dictionary and vice versa.
ROTFLMAO
The person who creates this, mind, I'm talking an extremely accurate one, will rule the world!
:lifter
LL
Bill Harsey
07-09-2010, 12:26
I could NEVER have (get away with) this conversation at my house.
For the sake of social science, try it, just once. :D
Gents....take heart. Here is a list (albeit very small list) of what women really mean.
The Men's Guide to what the Woman really mean
You want = You want
We need = I want (unless followed by the sentance below)
We need to talk = I need to complain
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.
Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.
Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to.
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
You're ... so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.
You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all you ever think about?
I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I'm on my period.
Be romantic, turn out the lights. = I'm Embarassed
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.
I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...
I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white.
Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not
going to like.
I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.
Am I a little fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.
You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.
Yes = No | No = No | Maybe = No
I'm sorry. = You'll be sorry.
Do you like this recipe? = It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it
Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until
he goes to sleep.
I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.
All we're going to buy is a soap dish = It goes without saying that
we're stopping at the cosmetics department, the shoe department, I
need to look at a few new pocket books,and those pink sheets would
look great in the bedroom and did you bring your checkbook?
Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.]
Hey....it's a start. :munchin
We all need a "male-to-female" dictionary and vice versa.
Take heart ladies, here's a list for you. :D
The Woman's Guide to What the Man is Really Saying
.
"I'm hungry." = I'm hungry.
"I'm sleepy." = I'm sleepy.
"I'm tired." = I'm tired.
"Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"Can I take you out to dinner?" = Same as Above
"Can I call you sometime?" = Same as Above
"Nice shoes" = Same as Above
"Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!
"You look tense, let me give you a massage." = I want to feel your bare skin
"What's wrong?" = I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of this.
"What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now?
"I love you, too." = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = I liked it better before.
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = $50 and it doesn't look that much different!
"Let's talk." = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then we can get down to business
"Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.
(while shopping) "I like that one better." = Pick any freakin' dress and let's go home!
:D
Bill Harsey
07-09-2010, 15:26
Sdiver,
prepare for incoming and brace for impact. :eek:
I find this source to be of great help - http://www.thedevilsdictionary.com/
Richard :munchin
Sdiver,
prepare for incoming and brace for impact. :eek:
C'mon, Bill...I thought those were funny....maybe because none of them apply to me.
SouthernDZ
07-09-2010, 16:52
As a young, dumb, newly married man my wife asked me which dress didn't make her look "hippy" - the red one, the black one or the beige one. Like a young, dumb, newly married man - I gave her my opinion.
That was my first wife.
ZonieDiver
07-09-2010, 17:15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dozer523
I could NEVER have (get away with) this conversation at my house.
For the sake of social science, try it, just once. :D
... and take video! Talk about going viral on YouTube! :D
Green Light
07-09-2010, 17:41
"Fine." is much more ominous...
Yer darn tootin! That's nigh unto a death sentence. :D
The Reaper
07-09-2010, 17:46
I asked my fiancee if she minded if I went to Myrtle Beach for Bike Week with my buddies during her birthday.
She said "Fine" and "Do whatever you want", so I did.
Boy, for someone who didn't seem to have an opinion, she sure got one in a hurry when I called her a few days later to check in.:D
TR
Is that even possible?
That's a matter of personal preference.
dr. mabuse
07-09-2010, 20:36
*
x SF med
07-10-2010, 10:16
For the sake of social science, try it, just once. :D
... and place the muzzle of the pistol right between your eyes, and hold aim for your significant other.... it's just quicker and less painful that way.:eek:
Bill you are an evil man.
Sometimes, simple literature has the answer. Try Looking into the book of Corinthians. I can't remember, one or two. It's about love. :)
ROTFLMAO
The person who creates this, mind, I'm talking an extremely accurate one, will rule the world!
:lifter
LL
My wife and I played out this scenario last night while preparing dinner together; fortunately, the dinner and wine were excellent (grilled rib-eyes, chilled black bean mango salad, and a Banfi Brunello di Montalcino) and peace had been restored by the time we finished eating. ;)
Richard,
Out of this whole thread your wine selection is what caught my eye...I happen to be sitting on a few bottles of '04 Banfi, not quite as good as the 1997s but at half the price, still pretty damn good!
This is one of my favorite wines and locally I can get the Rosso di Montalcino...usually this is the same stuff but since the producers are legally capped the number of bottles that can be called Brunello they take the rest and bottle it with a different name. It is knowing which years are the good years for the Rosso! Anyways enjoy!
Now back on topic...yeah I have a wife too and I never know what she is talking about!!!
!