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JJ_BPK
04-22-2010, 07:20
Be afraid... VERY afraid!

IDIOT SIGHTING:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'
His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS

IDIOT SIGHTING:

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.

He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'

The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.

The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce..

-- From Kansas City

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a probation officer in Wichita, KS

IDIOT SIGHTING:

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.


IDIOT SIGHTING:

How would you pronounce this child's name?

"Le-a"

Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.

This child attends a school in Kansas City , Mo. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong. It's pronounced "Ledasha." When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us...

and they VOTE

and REPRODUCE!

JJ_BPK
04-22-2010, 09:49
Please tell me these aren't real stories....

Consigliere, if I were able to guarantee the truthfulness of the individual's statements, I would have posted in the Soapbox.

Alas, I can not.. :cool:

akv
04-22-2010, 10:43
JJ_BPK,

Sir this is what I imagine the Democratic National Convention is like. :)

spherojon
04-22-2010, 13:48
This happened to me last night,

Girl: "Ya, its going to be great, I get paid every two weeks instead of biweekly!"

Or at work,
Me: "Crap, we lost the footage."
Guy: "What are you guys shooting on?" (Shooting HD Cameras in a studio)
Me: "P2 Cards."
Guy: "Just rewind the tape then!"
Me: "It's a hard drive."
Guy: "Oh...Well rewind the hard drive then."

/facepalm

JJ_BPK
04-22-2010, 14:10
This happened to me last night,

Girl: "Ya, its going to be great, I get paid every two weeks instead of biweekly!"

/facepalm

Be careful,, Biweekly (Semi-weekly) can be twice a week or every other week (a fortnight or bimonthly),, while biennial is every other year and biannual is twice a yr..

Although unlikely, she may have been correct.

I had several lady friends that were paid by the hour... :eek::eek:

219seminole
04-22-2010, 15:19
When my wife was an OSUT company commander at Ft McClellan, twin sisters came through training: Latrina and Latrasha. As God is my witness, it is true.

Green Light
04-22-2010, 15:58
Who makes up these names? Just put "La" in front of whatever they find on a random page in the dictionary?

spherojon
04-22-2010, 16:04
I had several lady friends that were paid by the hour... :eek::eek:Ya, I have some lady friends too, but they have to pay for college somehow.

nmap
04-22-2010, 18:38
Here's another group that seems to qualify for this thread.

LINK (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yk2vR8w2sjc)

I regard it as proof positive that we are utterly, absolutely doomed.

armymom1228
04-22-2010, 19:00
I stopped at a gas station I frequent last night, to get gas. Being a few days before payday. I had a handful of change in addition to the $13. I walk in, put the bills down and tell the lady, an older latina, "whatever it comes to on pump three." I have don't this plenty of times before, never been a problem. Usualy there is a ME type behind the counter.

The lady looked at the bills and change and exclaimed, "Oh this is too much, too much." So I counted out the change and said.."okay That is $14.64" She looked real confused and pushed the 4 pennies at me saying, again, "too much, you paid me too much". I gave up and pocketed the pennies. The pump cut off at exactly
$14. :rolleyes:

PSM
04-22-2010, 19:04
Here's another group that seems to qualify for this thread.

LINK (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yk2vR8w2sjc)

I regard it as proof positive that we are utterly, absolutely doomed.

I regard this as proof of a spoof. ;)

Pat

nmap
04-22-2010, 19:06
I regard this as proof of a spoof. ;)

Pat

Please, let it be so.

The Reaper
04-22-2010, 19:19
Who makes up these names? Just put "La" in front of whatever they find on a random page in the dictionary?

That makes the name Phrench. Or is it Swahili?

TR

PSM
04-22-2010, 19:22
Please, let it be so.

'Tis done, my son. Go, and sin no more.

Father Patrick

Mississippi10
04-23-2010, 11:03
This one is true. Coming home from vacation a few years ago, ready to be there, we stopped at Sonic for a "quick" pick-up. The carhop was obviously not the brightest; as the order came, my wife got out a $50. I told her, don't use that big a bill; it'll cost us fifteen minutes. My wife laughed and gave the girl the 50. It took the original carhop and two "managerial" types fifteen minutes to figure out change.

ZonieDiver
04-23-2010, 12:16
Try this:

At a fast food joint or convenience store... your bill comes to $4.87 and you give the cashier $5.12. They'll just stare at it, try to give you the change back, or say "this is too much" - when all they have to do is punch it into the computerized cash register and it'll let them know you were just trying to get a quarterback (much like the AZ Cardinals :D).

I do it for sport now...

SF-TX
04-23-2010, 15:59
Picture recently taken along the coast of Texas.

Ret10Echo
04-23-2010, 20:30
I saw the thread title and had to check it out and see if I recognized anyone...





I work in Washington, DC








(Think about it)

armymom1228
04-23-2010, 20:34
I saw the thread title and had to check it out and see if I recognized anyone...





I work in Washington, DC








(Think about it)

There isn't enough bandwidth here for that many photos....:D

Green Light
04-23-2010, 21:20
I saw the thread title and had to check it out and see if I recognized anyone...





I work in Washington, DC








(Think about it)
I work in DC. No pictures. I drive from WV to Metro station in the dark. Go directly from metro to work. No windows. Leave work directly to Metro. By the time I get to the car it is dark. Do not like daytime shiny thing in sky. :D

Ret10Echo
04-23-2010, 21:42
But here's a recent occurence:

Driving back down from PA one weekend, I decided to stop off at a fast-food establishment just off the highway.

After stepping up to the counter, the employee asked me what I would like so I placed my order for a large milkshake.

After entering the keystrokes into the cash register, he looked me in the eye and asked me "Is this to go?".

My response back to him was "Yes, does that mean I get a cup?"

longrange1947
04-23-2010, 22:04
I enjoyed the visuals of that movie, now, it is ruined forever in my mind. :D

Scimitar
04-24-2010, 00:33
True Story...

I had recently arrived in the US and was working with a company that serviced numerous bars and nightclubs in Vegas while I was waiting to ship out to Basic.

One night I was working at one of (cough) "those" types of bars and was out back on a break. One of the "dancers" was on her break as well.

My boss came out and asked me for my Social Security Number. So I said
"Sure Ken, let me just pull it out of my wallet, I haven’t quite memorized it yet" (I had just received it few months earlier).

The "dancer" looked at me and said
"You haven’t memorized your SS#?"
"You got it when you where a kid right?"

I said
"No I'm not from the US and I only just arrived" (As if my accent didn't give that away?)

And she said....
"What's the US got to do with it...the whole world gets a SS#!"

Reason #47 why I guess she was a stripper. :D


Scimitar

Requiem
04-26-2010, 00:48
IDIOT SIGHTING:

A woman ran over a mattress on the highway and kept on driving until the jumble of wrapped wire springs under her car ripped a hole in the gas tank. The subsequent lack of fuel is what finally stopped her.

She had managed to drive 30 miles with a 60-pound tangle of mattress springs and fluff wrapped around the drive shaft. She had it towed to the dealership and complained that the vehicle had a "sort of a shimmy" when driven at high speeds.

Duh... :rolleyes: