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Spartan359
08-04-2007, 00:19
TO: Medical Personnel
FROM: Human Resource

It has come to our attention from several emergency rooms that many EMS narratives have taken a decidedly creative direction lately. Effective immediately, all members are to refrain from using slang and abbreviations to describe patients, such as the following.

Cardiac patients should not be referred to with MUH (messed up heart), PBS (pretty bad shape), PCL (pre-code looking) or HIBGIA (had it before, got it again).

Stroke patients are NOT "Charlie Carrots." Nor are rescuers to use CCFCCP (Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs) to describe their mental state.

Trauma patients are not FDGB (fall down, go boom), TBC (total body crunch) or "hamburger helper". Similarly, descriptions of a car crash do not have to include phrases like "negative vehicle to vehicle interface" or "terminal deceleration syndrome."

HAZMAT teams are highly trained professionals, not "glow worms."

Persons with altered mental states as a result of drug use are not considered "pharmaceutically gifted."

Gunshot wounds to the head are not "trans-occipital implants."

The homeless are not "urban outdoorsmen", nor is endotracheal intubation referred to as a "PVC Challenge".

And finally, do not refer to recently deceased persons as being "paws up," ART (assuming room temperature), CC (Cancel Christmas), CTD (circling the drain), or NLPR (no long playing records).

I know you will all join me in respecting the cultural diversity of our patients to include their medical orientations in creating proper, narratives and log entries.

Sincerely,
Directory of Human Resource

shadowwalker
08-04-2007, 20:34
Can't stop laughing that was great.

smokfire
08-04-2007, 22:08
LMAO!

Please don't forget:

Please refrain from using the phrase "presence of hazardous materials was confirmed by first arriving "blue canary" (police officer)".

Patients mechanism of injury will no longer be labeled as "concrete poisoning" for falls or "lead poisoning" for gun shot victims.

smokfire

AF IDMT
08-05-2007, 13:00
Thanks, Spartan, that made me smile.:D

Sdiver
08-07-2007, 19:07
LMAO!

Please don't forget:

Patients mechanism of injury will no longer be labeled as "concrete poisoning" for falls

smokfire

Or also for falls..."Sudden deceleration c, [name of street]." :D