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gunnerjohn
12-05-2006, 22:53
Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1973 Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his to show Jack.

2006 School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1973 Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled.

2006 Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1973Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by Principal. Sits still in class.

2006 Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad gives him a whipping.

1973 Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2006 Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state psychologist that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to school.

1973 Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the smoking dock.

2006 Police called.......Mark expelled from school for drug violations.Car searched for drugs and weapons.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Mary turns up pregnant.

1973 5 High School Boys leave town. Mary does her senior year at a special school for expectant mothers.

2006 â?'??€oe Middle School Counselor calls Planned Parenthood, who notifies the ACLU. Mary is driven to the next state over and gets an abortion without her parent's consent or knowledge. Mary given condoms and told to be more careful next time.


+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.

1973: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.

2006: Pedro's cause is taken up by state Democratic party. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation, is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he can't speak English.

+++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July,puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant hill.

1973 Ants die.

2006 BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.


+++++++++++++++++++++
Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary, hugs him to comfort him.

1973 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.


2006 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison.
All in the name of progress!
Enjoy your day.

x SF med
12-06-2006, 08:07
Gunner-
Is this scary, or funny? Both, I think. I fall into the 1973 group of kids - I guess I'm just a traumatized, terroristic, abused soul in need of really deep counseling.... NOT! You did leave out the trauma of Catholic Schools in the late 60's early 70's. Good Post.

futureSoldier
12-06-2006, 09:38
In ninth grade, some friends and I were threatened with expolsion for drugs after we put ora-gel(over-the-counter tooth numbing gel) on a friends hamburger-friend didn't care... dad had to go yell at the principle and ask him if it felt good threatening boys for being boys (man, I was proud)...

when were SENTENCED for puttin chicken litter in some of the hallways of the high school for a senior prank, we were described by the DA as "biological terrorists" and the DA argued for 15 days in order to prove that our county of 15,000 would not stand for "domestic terrorism"-this was only 8 months post 9-11... (the DA was running for Congress at the time-and was ELECTED)

But the best... I think you all will get a kick out of this... I grew up so far out in the boonies on rough dirt roads that we had sort of a group bus-stop where parents would drive from within 1 or 2 miles and drop their children off. There were about 10 children total, 8 of us were boys and all of us we within 2 or 3 years. So most days after school we would do what boys do-wrestle or play football. A therapist, with no children of his own, lived on one of the roads and would stop his Volvo and tell us to go home, that we were violent and awful children. We normally ignored him. He finally called SOCIAL SERVICES on our parents as they would see us wrestling and think nothing of it. My dad, who is a Doctor of Divinity, waited for the man to show up the next day... and properly taught us youngsters how to cuss when the time comes for cussing... the man never said another word.

Monsoon65
12-06-2006, 15:07
Gunner-
Is this scary, or funny? Both, I think. I fall into the 1973 group of kids - I guess I'm just a traumatized, terroristic, abused soul in need of really deep counseling.... NOT! You did leave out the trauma of Catholic Schools in the late 60's early 70's. Good Post.

Trauma and Catholic schools go together! Can't have one without the other.

I'm a 1973 kid, too (was 8 at the time). I think I did most of what was on that post and I ended up relatively normal.

Great post, Gunner!

incommin
12-06-2006, 15:26
In the mid 50's I was building cannons, making my own black powder, and shooting concrete filled cans out over the ocean at Patrick AFB, FL.

Couldn't do that today!

Jim

PSM
12-06-2006, 15:47
Why is this posted in the Comedy Zone? It seems the General Discussions forum would be more appropriate. ;)

Pat