View Full Version : A warp in the space-time continuum
Jack Moroney (RIP)
10-23-2006, 13:49
My mother was rather fond of tipping the crystal tumbler quite often and truly believed in fairies, leprauchans, and all sort of the wee-folk. She tried desparately to convince my sister and me that they were real and could often be called up in times of distress. She would blame any number of the more feisty wee-folk for natural events and call upon the angels and good faires to help resolve the problem. My sister, who was 3 at the time, was having a difficult time trying to go to sleep in a thunder storm. So my mother went in, explained to her that everything was going to be all right because the faires and angels were in her room and one rather beautiful angel was, in fact, sitting on her bed. My mother stuck her head back in about half an hour later and my sister was still having a tough time. So she once again explained that the angels and faires were doing their best to which my sister replied, " Yeah, yeah mom I know. But would you get this GD angel off my bed it is bothering me." A couple of years back both my parents passed away and my sister and I went out to Phoenix to clean out the house and sell it. We found all sorts of pictures and statuettes of fairies, gnombs, lepruchans, etc. We howled. So we packed all the stuff up, sent a lot to good will, and sold the lot. When I got home my sister had secretly sent along 3 plastic garden gnombs/faires to my house as a joke-but that was okay because I sent all the parental ashes to her house. I kept those little figures and I position them around the wooded property as coversation pieces. The grandkids always make a game of trying to find where they are standing watch over various parts of the forest. Seems that it is not only the grandkids that like these things. A red squirrel has apparently adopted one as sentry and is beginning to harvest hemlock cones and mushrooms and is piling them around one that I placed on a stump. Either that or my mother is out there somewhere trying to feed her faires and wee folk.:D
x SF med
10-23-2006, 13:59
Who woulda thunk that a family named Moroney would believe in little people and angels??? Truly baffling,Sir. :D
Team Sergeant
10-23-2006, 14:26
It's all fun and games until one of those little %@^!^#$ golf ball stealing fairies lifts one of your balls on a perfect 325yard drive on the toughest par five on the golf course.
I believe in them..... &^%@&^%*#^%&:D
TS
Next time I'll make a "hemlock cone and mushroom" offering before the next round of golf!
Jack Moroney (RIP)
10-23-2006, 14:30
Next time I'll make a "hemlock cone and mushroom" offering before the next round of golf!
I stick a tee in the mix that is growing as we speak. Let me know if it worked:D
TS
Next time I'll make a "hemlock cone and mushroom" offering before the next round of golf!
Leave a wee bit of wine, they enjoy the drink too. :D
Great recap and picture, Colonel!
LibraryLady
10-23-2006, 18:35
Leave a wee bit of wine, they enjoy the drink too. :D
Great recap and picture, Colonel!
I thought you were supposed to leave a wee bit of the Irish? :confused:
Wonderful story, sir. Them squirrels they'll enlist anyone...
LL
LL, can be one and the same I suppose. I always call it "the drink" no matter what "the drink" is/was... :D
Cincinnatus
10-23-2006, 19:20
So this golfer knocks one into the rough and as he's looking for his ball he hears this little voice calling for help. He looks around and finds a hole - about waist deep. Waist deep for a grown man that is. Deep enough though that a leprechaun has fallen in and cannot get out.
The golfer reverses his club, extends it so the little fellow can grab hold and pulls him out.
"So," says the leprechaun, "You'll be wantin' your t'ree wishes, now."
"Oh no," replies the golfer, "I don't want anything. Glad to be of help."
"Me boyo. You get t'ree wishes. It's the standard deal. Now let's get on wit' it."
The golfer demurs again. So the leprechaun (the little people can be a mite testy) makes them for him. "You'll become a scratch golfer, win a lot of money and have a wonderful sex life," he declares.
The golfer, amused, thanks him and goes back to his game.
Years later at the same course the golfer drives straight down the fairway and ends up just short of the green. As he's walking along he hears a voice call from the woods. Looking over he sees the leprchaun and goes over to say hello.
The leprechaun asks how he's been since they last met and the golfer replies that he's been great.
"My golf game has really improved and the week after I saw you I won the Irish sweepstakes. I gave most of the money to charity, but I got some nice things for myself."
"And?"
"That's pretty much it."
"Well, what about your sex life, me boyo?" the leprechaun demands.
"Oh, yeah. That's been great, too. I've been getting laid three or four times a month."
"T'ree or four times a munt'!" the leprechaun sputters. "That's all?"
"Well," replies the golfer, "that's not bad for a priest with no car in a small parish."