HOLLiS
09-04-2006, 09:42
2005 Stella Awards!
Time once again to review the winners of the Annual "Stella Awards."
The Stella Awards are named after 81 year-old Stella Liebeck who
spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in NM).
That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous,
ridiculous, successful lawsuits in the United States
Here are this year's winners:
5th Place (tie):
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000 by a jury of
her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was
running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were
understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving
little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.
5th Place (tie):
19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr.. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
5th Place (tie):
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he
had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to
get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut.
The family was on vacation, and Mr.. Dickson found himself locked
in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he
found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's
insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish.
The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000.
4th Place:
Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next
door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's
fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt
the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr.. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard and
was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd Place:
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the
floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds
earlier during an argument.
2nd Place:
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a
night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom
window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This
occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window
in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She
was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
1st Place:
This year's runaway winner was Mrs.. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
Oklahoma. Mrs.. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On her first trip home, (from an OU football game),
having driven onto the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70
mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back & make
herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway,
crashed and overturned. Mrs..Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually do
this. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this
suit, just in case there were any other complete morons around.
Time once again to review the winners of the Annual "Stella Awards."
The Stella Awards are named after 81 year-old Stella Liebeck who
spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in NM).
That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous,
ridiculous, successful lawsuits in the United States
Here are this year's winners:
5th Place (tie):
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000 by a jury of
her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was
running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were
understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving
little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.
5th Place (tie):
19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr.. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
5th Place (tie):
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he
had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to
get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut.
The family was on vacation, and Mr.. Dickson found himself locked
in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he
found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's
insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish.
The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000.
4th Place:
Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next
door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's
fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt
the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr.. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard and
was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd Place:
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the
floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds
earlier during an argument.
2nd Place:
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a
night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom
window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This
occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window
in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She
was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
1st Place:
This year's runaway winner was Mrs.. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
Oklahoma. Mrs.. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago
motor home. On her first trip home, (from an OU football game),
having driven onto the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70
mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back & make
herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway,
crashed and overturned. Mrs..Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually do
this. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this
suit, just in case there were any other complete morons around.