View Full Version : Fish Problem
Bill Harsey
06-03-2006, 17:59
Here is the fish problem, My wife and kids left for Portland at 5:30 am this morning, for the day. She is do back in a couple hours (7:30 West Coast Civilian time).
There is a fresh out of the water 9 lb. steelhead in the kitchen sink.
How do I convince her I was here working all day long?
Sweetbriar
06-03-2006, 18:08
Can a good friend who also fishes visit you really quick? He came by.... and isn't that a great fish? You don't connect the two, let her. Then change the subject to her shopping trip and keep it there.
Lying is a sin. Woe is me....
Good luck.
Ambush Master
06-03-2006, 18:15
Hell, EAT IT!!! Or give it to the cats.
Really, filet it out, bag it and BURY it in the Freezer!!
Can a good friend who also fishes visit you really quick? He came by.... and isn't that a great fish? You don't connect the two, let her. Then change the subject to her shopping trip and keep it there.
Ooo...Ooo....I like this. This could work.
And to add to the site picture, have a few empty beer bottles around to show that this "friend"/ "fishing buddy" came by.
It could work....if you REEEEAAAALLLLLYYYYYY sell it.
NousDefionsDoc
06-03-2006, 19:08
Sofia wouldn't even ask, she'd just come in, roll up the sleeves and make the maid start cleaning it.
Bill Harsey
06-03-2006, 19:11
Sofia wouldn't even ask, she'd just come in, roll up the sleeves and make the maid start cleaning it.
I've been wondering how Sofia was doing.
:D
LibraryLady
06-03-2006, 19:29
It is easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission. ;)
Just make sure the BBQ is fired up and the afore mentioned piscis seconds away from application to grill when she rolls up in the driveway.
LL
NousDefionsDoc
06-03-2006, 19:31
Deny everything, make counter-accusations, and kill all key witnesses. And for Buddha's sake, make sure the fish is dead so he can't talk!
Jack Moroney (RIP)
06-03-2006, 19:33
Here is the fish problem, My wife and kids left for Portland at 5:30 am this morning, for the day. She is do back in a couple hours (7:30 West Coast Civilian time).
There is a fresh out of the water 9 lb. steelhead in the kitchen sink.
How do I convince her I was here working all day long?
Well damn Bill this should be easy.
"Honey there I was busting my butt making sharp pointy things so that you and the kids could feel secure in knowing that I was doing everything to provide for your future (and all those credit card bills y'all ran up today) when your favorite horse was spooked by a couple of those mountain bike riding, tie-dye wearing, snot-nosed, unwashed, beaded, multi-body part pierced, illegal-alien type Kalifornian hippies. Knowing how you love that beast, I risked catching tetanus by knocking one of them off her rusty mountain bike and pursued at all haste, risking additional injury to my knees and clam shell cut hand, your horse down into the stream. Diving from the bike I was able to grab the horse around the neck and calming the beast I noticed that the beast had kicked this damn steelhead senseless. So what the heck, I brought him home, threw him in the sink, and went diligently back to work for you and the kids."
........make sure the fish is dead so he can't talk!
...(in best Sopranos accent)...."Tonight, dat fish is going to be sleeping wif da fishes..."
sorry
Bill Harsey
06-03-2006, 20:00
Well damn Bill this should be easy.
"Honey there I was busting my butt making sharp pointy things so that you and the kids could feel secure in knowing that I was doing everything to provide for your future (and all those credit card bills y'all ran up today) when your favorite horse was spooked by a couple of those mountain bike riding, tie-dye wearing, snot-nosed, unwashed, beaded, multi-body part pierced, illegal-alien type Kalifornian hippies. Knowing how you love that beast, I risked catching tetanus by knocking one of them off her rusty mountain bike and pursued at all haste, risking additional injury to my knees and clam shell cut hand, your horse down into the stream. Diving from the bike I was able to grab the horse around the neck and calming the beast I noticed that the beast had kicked this damn steelhead senseless. So what the heck, I brought him home, threw him in the sink, and went diligently back to work for you and the kids."
I'm going with this one.
A 9lb steelhead might just be worth the wrath, story or none.
Then again, I don't get to many good streams anymore. ::sigh::
Here is the fish problem, My wife and kids left for Portland at 5:30 am this morning, for the day. She is do back in a couple hours (7:30 West Coast Civilian time).
There is a fresh out of the water 9 lb. steelhead in the kitchen sink.
How do I convince her I was here working all day long?
How'd it go Mr. H?
You could have said you "brought home the bacon" so she could fry it up in a pan...
Bill Harsey
06-04-2006, 14:16
How'd it go Mr. H?
You could have said you "brought home the bacon" so she could fry it up in a pan...
still married.
still married.
Congrats. :D
CPTAUSRET
06-05-2006, 09:24
still married.
But...the day's not over!;)
For my wife it would be easy, I would cook the fish, prepare a nice salad, triming, etcs. When she got home, I would say I had a surprise for her and that you knew she would be tired. Show here the dinner table are ready to go, the smell of good food, bottle of wine and..... well maybe she will add a extra reward or two.
Sometimes, the way to a women's heart is through her stomach along with a glass of wine or two.